


Confessions and Conversations

by roseszain



Series: Of Love and Labels [2]
Category: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Day 2: Ace Day, Demisexual Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Demisexuality, Emotionally Constipated Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, Geraskier Pride Week 2020, Gray-Asexuality, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Requited Unrequited Love, Touch-Averse Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia, failwitcher geralt, yes i took that from failwolf derek it fits
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-24
Updated: 2020-06-24
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:34:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24870868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roseszain/pseuds/roseszain
Summary: Jaskier travels with Geralt and Ciri, and there are some things that need to be talked about. Ciri makes sure to meddle just enough to make that happen.Grey-ace/demi GeraltDay 2: Ace Day
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
Series: Of Love and Labels [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1797982
Comments: 2
Kudos: 44
Collections: Geraskier Pride Week 2020





	Confessions and Conversations

**Author's Note:**

> Day 2: Ace Day for the Geraskier Pride Week 2020!  
> Info on the event [HERE](https://littlelarkandthewhitewolf.tumblr.com/post/621296869537169408/geraskier-pride-week-2020)
> 
> Geralt's experience with sex and touch are based off of me. I'm grey-ace. This is not how everyone experiences being demi or grey-ace and please look up more info if you're unfamiliar with it. 
> 
> Not beta'd. Comments are MORE than welcome!

Jaskier followed through and joined Ciri and Geralt as they left the next day. He brought extra apples and strawberries and would sneak a few whenever Geralt wasn't looking. 

He kept a respectful distance from Geralt when they were walking though. Ciri mostly kept to herself, picking flowers and touching leaves of passing trees. Occasionally asking a question about a plant they passed by or a monster they'd fought in the past. 

Jaskier was unusually silent, keeping his lute on his back and never playing it. He struck up conversations with Ciri, stepping in to answer questions and bringing up stories Ciri didn't know when she was more talkative. 

They all did pretty good together. Jaskier hesitated a bit to go back to his old routines of settling Roach in for the night and setting up their bed rolls and tents. But Geralt was quick to reassure him that he could do the chores that he wanted. Ciri and Geralt shared a tent while Jaskier stayed in his own tent he brought with. So it took a little longer than usual. Ciri gathered wood for the fire and scrounged up a meal. She still needed more breaks and food than them, a growing girl still getting used to walking so much at a time. 

\- - - - - 

They chatted around the fire after their meal, and Geralt spoke a little longer than usual, but still walked away when he was done talking. Though this time it was Ciri that caused him to walk away. 

They were talking about Jaskier's music. Mostly Geralt talking shit about it good-naturedly and Jaskier was telling stories of his not so fantastic performances where they'd end in fights or arguments, usually getting him banned from the place. 

Ciri was very curious, both about his life as a bard and the artistic aspect of it. How he wrote his songs and he learned to play the lute. Jaskier was more than thrilled to wax poetic about his time at Oxenfurt and his exemplary skills, as well as his arch nemesis Valdo Marx. 

Ciri interrupted him in the middle of telling a story about a crazy situation that was supposedly the basis for one of his more popular songs (Geralt was rolling his eyes and side-eyeing him the whole time because he was there for half it and it went nothing like that). She asked about his inspiration for the song he'd sang the previous night at the tavern, as it was still fresh in her mind and she was very aware of the deep affect it had on Jaskier and Geralt. 

Jaskier snapped his head up at that, a slight blush on his cheeks. "Ahh, that one isn't mine I'm afraid. I heard a LOVELY singer perform it on my travels and fell in love with it. I found out she wrote it and I implored her to let me perform it as well. It's so beautiful and emotional. I get so wrapped up in it every time I sing. It's a magical song."

Jaskier directed his words at Ciri, but Ciri took glances at Geralt to see what he was doing. He had his body faced almost completely away from the whole fire pit and the two talking. He had his arms crossed in protectiveness. 

As Ciri began to respond, "It really is. Why does it get to you so?", Geralt stood up and walked toward his things, picking a spot a good distance away from them and started sharpening a sword. 

Jaskier watched Geralt leave with a small frown on his face. "Ah, that's a bit more complicated. Plus giving that away looses the ability for the listener to find their own meaning in the song." 

Ciri yawned and nodded. "That's -" she yawned again. "I'm sorry. I think it's time for me to head to bed."

"Sleep well Ciri!" Jaskier waved at her and smiled as she retreated to her tent. Geralt looked up from his sword and gave a small smile before wishing her goodnight. 

\- - - - - 

Jaskier stayed at the fire for good while, letting Geralt work in peace. He took out his notebook of ideas and jotted down a few things before he forgot. 

Geralt finally got up from his sword sharpening corner and sat on the opposite side of the fire, setting his sword beside him. 

"Ciri's taking well to you. She hasn't asked this many questions since I found her."

Jaskier burst out a loud laugh at that, "You two are so similar. Though she's got a glint of curiosity in her eyes I rarely see in you." 

That got a smile out of Geralt and a quick look at Jaskier before he focused back at the stitches in his clothes. "She's been a bit persistent in learning about you whenever you're brought up."

Jaskier quickly tampered down his excitement and focused on a different part of that sentence . "Aw, a young fan! She's got good taste."

"Eh, they're alright." Geralt smirked. 

Okay he could do this. He could ask Jaskier the thing. Just open his mouth and say the words. Come on. "So what's the real truth behind that song? Too innapropriate for Ciri?"

His heart was pounding in his chest and he felt the beginning of butterflies from the anxiety building, but he'd done it. He looked at Jaskier to see his reaction.

"That's - ah, it's more... personal than anything. I didn't think either of you would ever see me perform it. Mostly because I thought it'd be pretty obvious once you heard it." He fidgeted with his hands and readjusted his blouse as he spoke, crimson staining his cheeks clearly noticable from the fire light. Oh dear gods he knew he was right. 

"Fuck." Geralt mumbled, hopeful that Jaskier hadn't heard him. He spoke a little louder next, still very nervous to look Jaskier in the eyes. "I thought I knew, but I wanted to make sure. Ciri tells me I'm surprisingly dense sometimes."

Jaskier got even more flustered. "Ah-hmm," he cleared his throat, "that's why I didn't want you to hear it. It's pretty on the nose. I mean you're not with Yennefer but, yeah. I figured you find me out and hate me even more."

Geralt got up and moved a few boulders closer to Jaskier, hearing the beating of Jaskier's heart speed up and wanting to comfort him. He shuffled a foot along the ground, swirling the dirt around. "I don't - fuck. I don't hate you. I regret ever making you think that." His eyebrows got closer together as he scrunched his face up in agony.

Jaskier awkwardly laughed at that. "I know you do, but I'm still... working through it. And you never being one to express emotions or, really, show care for me, made it harder. I'm... glad you're learning to use your words. It seems Ciri has been very good for you."

"She's very similar to me in how she deals with things, but ah, she's insisted on talking about you a lot. She's very invested in our relationship - our friendship." 

Jaskier laughed a proper laugh this time, quick and loud. "A real matchmaker. Yes she does seem the type. Very insistent on us being around each other." He readjusted his legs and quickly toned his voice down and became serious. "I'm sorry if she's bothered you at all. I know I put my heart on my sleeve a lot and my motives and intent can be very obvious, but that doesn't mean you're on the same page." Jaskier curled in on himself a bit, hunching his shoulders and tucking his legs underneath him. "I can depart from you at the next town. There's no need to force something that doesn't exist." His heart thudded so loud and so quick, his voice breaking and hitching, that Geralt had to force himself not to be on him in a second to comfort him.  
But he got up and moved a few more boulders closer, this time now only a few feet away from Jaskier.

"You don't have to leave. I wouldn't ask you to. It's," he cleared his throat, his body starting to match the anxiety that he could feel coming from Jaskier, "It's your choice. Ciri and Roach clearly enjoy having you around, and I wouldn't agree to it if I wasn't comfortable with it."

Jaskier heaved a big sigh and turned towards Geralt, "Yes, you're very kind Geralt, but there's no reason for me to be here while I'm still a fucking mess trying to get past my feelings with Ciri trying to get us together! It's not fair to you and I can only handle so much." 

Geralt wanted to reach out and reassure him, calm him. "Jas, I'm not - I know you're working through things. I don't expect you to forgive me and move past everything in one day. But," he caught his breath and took a few seconds to find the words, "if you want this, if I didn't misunderstand, I didn't think you could - I never imagined... I didn't let myself even entertain... Something here exists between us, I'm just shit at showing it. And beyond hesitant to act on it."

Jaskier nudged himself a little closer to Geralt, his eyes trying to read Geralt's face. "I'm trying to be confident, but I can actually FEEL myself shaking. I'm still very upset with you, and that will take a while for me to get through that. But GODS Geralt, what am I supposed to do now?" His hand reached out and grasped Geralt's. "I can feel your heartbeat. Are you really that smitten?" He smiled softly. 

"I, ah, I practically cried hearing your song. Don't tell the humans, but I think I feel things a bit deeply." He chuckled, squeezing Jaskier's hand, his thumb caressing the skin of Jaskier's fingers. 

"It really got to you, huh? Gods I wanna kiss you. And woo you and jump your bones, but right now kissing is at the top." 

Geralt got a little stiff and looked down at the ground. 

Jaskier leaned back and loosened his grip on Geralt's hands. "Shit, too fast. Too much. Of course. No kissing? No wooing? No sexy time? What aren't you okay with? What do you want?"

"All of it? Maybe?" Geralt kept his distance, but felt like he could breath again. "This is really important. YOU'RE really important. And I've got more experience with a prostitute than any actual relationship. With Yennefer it was never an all out relationship. I'm not ready for a lot, and I know you're still working on trusting me again, and I'm still processing that you have feelings for me." Geralt looked up at the sky and breathed deeply. He needed to say this, to make Jaskier understand more. "And I don't - touch and sex I can disconnect from when it's a stranger, but it's a big deal for me. My senses are stronger than any humans, and touch can be really uncomfortable for me. We haven't - we've barely hugged when we traveled. And I'm not used to romantic touch without motive behind it. And I don't want you to be angry and upset as we get to know each other. So that's, that's what I want."

Jaskier nodded as he processed Geralt's words. "Okay, I can respect that. I mean, it's probably not healthy that I still sometimes want to scream and occasionally punch you. Who would have thought you'd be the level-headed one for once?" He smiled and nudged Geralt with his elbow.

Geralt could feel his anxiety breath a sigh of relief. "Don't think I won't hit you for being an idiot though. Lover or not."

"Ooooh," Jaskier sing-songed. "Loooover. I do like the sound of that." 

Geralt tapped him on the head in a faux-slap. "Ow! Okay. Point taken."

**Author's Note:**

> Jaskier insisted on saying "jump your bones", I had no choice. 
> 
> I'm on tumblr as [littlelarkandthewhitewolf](https://littlelarkandthewhitewolf.tumblr.com). Come say hi and talk about The Witcher with me! :)


End file.
